Tuesday, November 20, 2018 | ePaper
Marriage must follow rules
Rifat Zafreen :
Rabeya will tie the knot today. The groom is little known to Rabeya, she got attached through face book recently. She hardly knows the detail of him and his family. She is determined to marry the person she got to know three months back and upon her will Rabeya's family finally had to agree to marry her off with that little known person. And there is no marriage registration and other formalities arranged and followed in the marriage.
It is a common scenario nowadays. Boys and girls get to know each other through social media grow friendship, get in to romance and in many cases they end up in marrying each other very easily and even playfully without knowing each other and their family properly. This quick growth in such serious decision like getting married does not bring positive result and lasting effect in the relationship in the long run. Besides, both and especially girls and women get into danger that they get trapped due to such whimsical fast attempt.
Besides, no matter how boys and girls get to know each other, but while they decide to tie the knot, the marriage process has to follow the social rituals, trends, values and mostly marriage law as per state or religion fixes and describes. Decision of marriage should never be taken upon verbal commitment only and thus one should not marry based upon such promise only as such a serious and important issue like marriage should never be based upon a freckle and shaky footing. One must follow and honour the family law and social trends and rituals while marry in our social context.
To get the legal base, both the bride and groom have to be matured, adult and of age in case of marriage. Not only adult, as per the concerned law, age of the groom has to be at least 21 and 18 of the bride while marry.
Family of both the bride and groom have to agree in making this relationship. According to Muslim law, marriage is a religious rule which is considered as civil agreement. One party very clearly will propose the other party and the recipient party has to accept the proposal very clearly. It is a must to have witness in marriage. Generally two adult males or one adult male and one adult female or two adult females have to be the witness of the marriage. It is must and mandatory to fix 'denmohor' (marriage security money for the bride) in the marriage.
If the bride and groom are of Hindu religion, marriage has to be settled down following Hindu religion law and rituals. Other than being adult, there has to have 'joggo program'. Seven rounds or 'soptopodi' or 'sat pak' has to be completed in Hindu marriage. All the concerned rituals should be followed in the marriage according to Hindu religion.
Marriage in Christianity mainly is done in the church. Both in Catholic and Baptist Christianity, marriage is considered as a holy tie and agreement. Marriage has to be registered in both the Catholic and Baptist Christianity.
Process of marriage in Buddhist religion is done after selecting the bride and groom. After the selection marriage date is fixed socially informing all. Buddhist marriage is done through reciting verses and litting up the lamp of welfare 'mongol dip' and bride & groom getting blessed by the Buddhist monks.
Muslim marriage must be registered and it is mandatory to register the marriage within 30 days after marriage. Otherwise there is a provision for punishment for violating rule. If marriage is done by 'Kazi', it is Kazi's duty to register the marriage instant. It is difficult to prove any marriage without this registered marriage document called 'kabin nama' or 'nikah nama' in Muslim marriage.
While marriage is registered, incase of separation or divorce it is easy and possible to follow certain procedure. 'Kabin nama' is also needed to establish the claim for 'denmohor' and money for wife's regular expenditure. 'kabin nama' (Marriage document) is also needed to justify the legal birth of the children.
Bride and her family have to ensure, the bride has signed the column 18 of the 'kabin nama' where the right of the bride to divorce is given and ensured. Currently marriage registration in Hindu marriage has been optional that was not there before. Hindu marriage just follows some rituals and religious rules before the bride and groom without having any written format.
In many cases, in case of romantic marriage or love marriage, couple go for notary public for having marriage document. They also get magistrate's attestation as marriage document sometimes.
In this case it must follow all the procedures of family law for completing marriage. In case of marriage in Muslim religion this sort of marriage has to be done later through having registration after completing the 'kabin nama' in presence of witnesses. This would help avoid any legal tangles in future. All these process would help seeking aid and justice if the victimized wants to have in case of fraud marriage or any such betrayal.
So, to protect the right of our women, to protect their honour, marriage has to be and must be registered. Following social marriage trends this documentation can only save our women and overall their social status and so honour of our women and nation in broader scale.